Golden Shower and BDSM

Now that we’ve covered fisting, let’s talk about pee! A lot of people like to be pissed on ... probably a lot more than you could ever imagine. Still, others like to do the pissing. I’m not gonna judge. I’ll even admit (in this presumably best seller) that I once drank my own pee, because, frankly, I want you to buy my book, not kiss me. It was many years ago and (of course) for money. Annie and I were doing a session with a Japanese businessman who wanted to watch me pee in a cup and then drink my own piss.

“No way,” I said. Drinking my own pee would be less humiliating than drinking someone else’s pee, but it was just not my cup of tea. My cup of tea was tea, not urine.

“Gandhi drank his own pee,” Annie insisted.

“Yeah, but Gandhi drank his own pee because he was trying to stay alive. My situation is hardly that dire.”

Somehow, she convinced me to do it (as she did with everything) and moments later I was peeing in a cup and then drinking it. My urine tasted salty, much like my tears. In a blind taste test, I guarantee subjects would be unable to differentiate between the two. In the end, I realized drinking my own pee was far from terrible, which is something no one should ever have to realize.

But getting back to golden showers: Don’t be ashamed and don’t feel alone. One glance at YouPorn should be enough to convince you that you are not a completely isolated deviant, though I certainly wouldn’t bring up water sports on a first date.

But why would anybody be into pee of all things? Like so many other activities in this book, part of the arousal comes from breaking cultural taboos. And if you are into being humiliated, what could be more humiliating than being peed on? Perhaps being shat upon?

Getting back to golden showers, I will leave you with a few bits of advice.

First, be aware of sexually transmitted infections. Pee contains trace amounts of bacteria, so unless you are sure the pisser is clean as a whistle, don’t go there —especially if he asks you to drink his pee.

Also, if you are so obsessed with golden or brown showers (or really any of the fetishes and activities that I’ve described in this book) that it interferes with your work, home life, or life in general, it’s time to seek counseling.

That said, if you are gonna go for the gold, do it in the shower; it makes cleanup much easier. Make sure when you are doing it in the shower that you are sober and balanced. Overall, about two-thirds of accidental injuries happen in the bathtub or shower—which makes sense, because they can become slippery. That pisses me off!