Enema and BDSM

Since we just got gritty and talked about fisting and pee, and because I also admitted to drinking my own pee, I guess we can move on to enemas. First, why would anyone want to involve enemas in their BDSM play or sex lives?

Enemas are popular for a number of reasons. On a technical level, they clean the ass out, making it fresh and tidy for anal sex, fisting, and butt plugs. My first day working as a P.A. on a porn shoot, the director said, “We need to get enemas!” Turning to me, he asked, “Wanna come?”

As we walked to a Rite Aid, I tried to process this gritty reality of porn.

Finding the laxative aisle, he tossed an economy pack in his shopping basket. “I’m taking no chances. I’m getting a six-pack,” he declared, holding them up for all to see. (We were working on an anal film at the time.) Enemas are a great “anal douche.” Porn stars frequently use them before heavy-duty anal scenes. Enemas are to a clean asshole as Viagra is to boners.

However, some people just get off on enemas—the feeling of gushing liquid flowing into their asshole and the subsequent Olympic sprint to the bathroom. For a sub, allowing the Dom to administer an enema can make him or her feel vulnerable, desired, erotically humiliated, and completely at the Dom’s mercy, whereas the Dom gets to wield power over his sub by controlling this very personal function. Often enemas are used in “medical fetish” scenes where a “nurse” will administer an enema to a “patient.”

Whatever your reasons for wanting to incorporate enemas into your BDSM play, follow three simple rules so you don’t become Public Enema #1!

1. Never sneak up on someone who is tied up and simply shove the enema nozzle up his or her ass. This is a surprise no one wants. Best to give someone an enema when he or she is not tied up, for obvious reasons.

2. Use lukewarm water only. Not sure if it’s an urban legend, but the worst dungeon horror story I ever heard involved a newbie Dom who had been improperly trained administering a (literally) boiling hot enema to her client.

(She had been told to “heat it up,” but took this advice a little too far.) As one can imagine, this did not result in an erotic experience but rather an ambulance, surgery, and quite likely a lawsuit. Conversely, never give someone an ice-cold enema. If the recipient has a weak heart, it can prove fatal.

3. I’m not going to explain the mechanics of enemas, but know how they work before you use one. (Like so many toys, they come with directions.) Disposable, cheapo ones work just fine, though it’s a good idea to dump out the chemical solutions found in most and fill them with lukewarm water.

Those seem to be the main rules of enema etiquette. However, my boyfriend (as I was typing this) just added, “Don’t put one in your urethra. I saw that happen once in a video.” He’s probably correct.

Also, AVOID alcohol enemas. People die from them. (Not just college frat kids hazing each other, but older adults who should know better.) If you want to get drunk, do it the old fashioned way: chug beers and listen to Zeppelin. But remember, BDSM play should be done while sober anyway. Beer is an acquired taste and you don’t acquire it through your ass.