Fetishes and BDSM - fetish list
articles and tutorials Theory and practice of BDSM
Fetishes have a big role in BDSM play. Anton LaVey (founder of the Church of Satan) once said, “Every man is a fetishist. You simply have to discover his fetish.” If a person has a fetish, it’s usually not too hard to discover what it is. If you think he or she may be into feet, tell him/her your feet are damn tired and could use a massage. A foot fetishist will jump at the opportunity.
There are also other clues. Because I am an A cup, I will likely not attract a man with a “huge breast” fetish. (Though there are people with “small breast” fetishes, too!) Because I live in a six-floor walk-up, and therefore have seriously toned stems along with a penchant for micro-minis, I attract leg fetishists like bees to honey.
Since this is not a book about why people have fetishes or are into BDSM, I’m just going to list a few along with some minor notes. To keep research on the topic fun, I consulted not only my personal experiences and several BDSM guidebooks, but also my three thousand Facebook friends—none of whom are sexologists, but all of whom are over-sharing freaks.
Perhaps you and your partner can take a look at this list and circle the ones that excite you. If you have a fetish that your partner doesn’t share or vice versa, it’s not the end of the world. Most fetishists are not so extreme and an unwillingness to indulge their fetish generally doesn’t mean it’s over. When given the choice between a partner and a fetish, the overwhelming majority of people would choose their partner. But fetishes can be fun, especially if cool outfits are involved. With that said, I present you with a fun-filled yet totally incomplete list of fetishes.
High heels and knee-high boots Leather, latex, and rubber Ball stretching
Cages (being locked inside ’em!)
Piercings
Hair
Smoking
Hips
Flannel
Bunions
Schoolgirl uniforms (As a sub, this is basically all I wore.)
Bunny ears (on women)
Little Red Riding Hood costumes
Superheroes
Giants (Macraphiita is the technical term for men who get off on the thought of 50-foot women.)
Adult babies (technically known as infantilism)
Catsuits
Being auctioned off for charity
Gloves
Wrestling
Voyeurism
Tickling
Age-Play
Threesomes
Exhibitionism
Balloons (Balloon fetishists are called looners.)
Feet (and all the other aforementioned body parts)
Enemas (giving and/or getting them)
Pony play
Farts
Fucking stuffed animals (These people are known as plushies.)
Furverts (Unlike furries who just enjoy wearing animals costumes, furverts get off on it.)
Vorarephilia (Arousal occurs from the idea of eating, or being eaten by, another person, or by an animal. Since the fetish generally cannot be carried out in real life, it is enjoyed through pictures, stories, and videos.)
Realistic blow-up dolls and robots (Also called agalmatophilia, this one is costly!)
Sploshing (Also called wet and messy fetish or WAM, it is a form of fetishism whereby a person becomes aroused when substances are deliberately and generously applied to the naked skin.)
A “car and sign” fetish (My friend, George swears he met someone with this fetish....)
Shit
Piss
Blood
Snot
And ... vampires? I imagine, given the success of Twilight and the hotness of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart, this fetish scene has grown. But vampires are not always glamorous. My friend Kat and I once attended a vampire fetish party in Brooklyn hoping to find something akin to the Cullen family. What we found instead was a sprinkling of cape-clad dorks, discussing computer technology. “I had a feeling,” Kat said. “In nerd evolution, vampirism comes right after Dungeons & Dragons.”
Finally, from my friend Dan: “A woman in a PVC costume spanking a tied-up latex model of a large freshwater leech (about the size of a person, and visibly breathing) wearing a polyester girdle and a single and very large shiny spiked heel to fit over its posterior—with a bubble machine and the theme to Godzilla droning in the background to set the mood.”
Did I mention I have some very odd friends?
When a fetish involves a costume or make-believe scenario, it generally leads to our next topic... .